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Soldier's Coffee

This little grandmother was surprised by her 7 year old grandson one morning. He had made her coffee. She drank what was the worst cup of coffee in her life.

When she got to the bottom, there were three of those little green army men, and she asked him why they were there.

Her grandson replied, "On television, they say, 'The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup!'"


Grandma's Colors

I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me, and she was always correct, but it was fun
for me, so I continued.

At last, she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these yourself!"


Problems driving

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car-both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light."

After a few more minutes they came to another intersection and the light was red again and again they went right though. This time the woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention to the road and the next intersection to see what was going on.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through and she turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row! You could have killed us!"

Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh, am I driving?"


 

Grandma Buys a Bumper Sticker (PG)


Grandma writes:

The other day I went to the local religious book store where I saw a "Honk if you really love Jesus" bumper sticker. I
bought it and put it on the back bumper of my car and I'm really glad I did. What an uplifting experience followed.
I was stopped at the light of a busy intersection, just lost in thought  about the Lord, and didn't notice that the light had
changed. That bumper sticker really worked! I found lots of people who love Jesus. Why, the guy behind me started to
honk like crazy. He must really love the Lord because pretty soon he leaned out his window and yelled, "Jesus Christ!" as
loud as he could. Why, it was like a football game with him shouting, "Go, Jesus Christ, Go"! Everyone else started
honking too, so I leaned out my window and waved and smiled to all those loving people. There must have been a guy from Florida back there because I could hear him  yelling something about a sunny beach, and I saw him waving
in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. I had recently asked my two grandsons what that meant.
They kind of squirmed, looked at each other, giggled and told me that it was the Hawaiian good luck sign, so I leaned out
the window and gave him the good luck sign back. A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and were walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray, but just then I noticed that the
light had changed, and I stepped on the gas. It's a good thing I did, because I was the only car to get across the
intersection. I looked back at them standing there. I leaned out the window, gave them a big smile, and held up the Hawaiian Good Luck sign as I drove away. Praise  the Lord for such wonderful folks!

Love ya all,
Grandma


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